Feedback on The Godbaby

Your feedback from the judges on your 1^st Round story in the Short Story Challenge 2012 is below.  We hope you find the feedback helpful and hope to see you in our next competition!

''Godbaby'' by Matt McHugh  - WHAT THE JUDGE(S) LIKED ABOUT YOUR SCRIPT - There are some humorous moments in this story's unique approach to the ghost story genre............................There's some neat imagery in here--I'm thinking, in particular, about the line "An arm sat on a nearby bench, the area that had been ripped from the shoulder clearly visible, resembling a mass of melted earthworms." WOW! This was also a fun read, and atmospherically reminded me of that film from the 1980s, Coccoon -- old guys makin' trouble. Always a fun read.................................................   WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK - This story, especially its last section, unfolds at a very rapid pace. Both the horror and the comedy could be heightened by slowing down a little and reflecting on how the character react to the unimaginable events that befall them............................Opening a story with a quote is hard to do--I'd suggest better grounding, meaning the character needs to know where we are, who the characters are, and what the opening situation is so he can move forward...................…........................